Please, have some courtesy, have some sympathy, and some taste.

Here's a little something useless you may not know about me. I have a hard time not drinking my coffee too fast. I want to sit and enjoy it over a long period of time but part of my brain sees it as an unfinished task and works to complete it.

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You ever feel like people aren't listening to you when you're talking?
Don't get pissed, they might be doing you a huge favor without either of you knowing it.

Because you're a babbling moron.


I know this from personal experience.

It's a hard thing, to fall. Harder yet is to fall from so far.

As you would pass judgment on me, I have come to pass judgment on you all.

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"Perhaps you were expecting some surprise, for me to reveal a secret that had eluded you, something that would change your perspective of events, shatter you to your core. There is no great revelation, no great secret. There is only you." -Kreia

Go for the eyes, Boo! Go for the eyes!

I'm in a real good mood today. I don't know. Maybe it's the sunshine, the fact I've been eating well, sleeping enough. The fact I'm being pretty productive. The fact that I'm going on a wild adventure in a month. Maybe I'm choosing to be positive because I feel like I've been a downer lately and I don't want it affecting those close to me.

Seems I should blog while I'm happy so you can see what it's like, but truth is I don't have much to talk about right now. Lots of work to do!

So what else is new?

Things I am doing today:
- Kicking myself for being an idiot lately
- Getting anxious over some things I'd like to change in my personal life
- Trying not to think too far ahead in terms of life changes
- Thinking of my upcoming trip to Asia only in positive terms

It's still amazing to me how everything is information. I don't have enough information. And I don't know how to use all the information I get.



Neither do you, by the way.

You can do whatever you want in your tiny sphere of influence.
Of course you can't quite yet move mountains, but you can do
plenty already. My sphere is small, but I exercise my control over
it like a tyrannical dragon.

I don't have to talk to anyone I don't want to.
Don't have to see 'em neither.

I was never good at obeying the bizarre unwritten rules.

The Particles Know I'm Watching

Uranium decays over time in a process that's called nuclear decay. Unless you're watching it, that is. Then it defies the laws of physics and seems to stand still.

Anxiety's keeping me up again tonight. It's the kind of anxiety where you want to do so much but you know it's just not fucking possible to do it all. I want to build a fantastic success scenario at work and I want to make amazing designs and prototypes for the Mobile stuff (which we have no time/resources allocated to within the workday). I want to work out and reach another level of fitness. I want to write my novel. I want to practice my guitar playing and learn some songs, and I want to learn how to do decent recordings on Cubase. I want to learn how to make videos, editing and adding graphics. And I want to spend quality time with my love and do things together.

There are just nowhere near enough hours in the week, no matter how I try to crunch it. Even when I'm up until 2am like I am now, my brain's just not that functional for that long.

Frustration!

You Will Become Clever Through Your Mistakes (German proverb)

*Work ↑
*Training ↑
*Diet -
*Creativity ↓↓
*Gaming ↓

Maintaining motivation on many fronts is exhausting, especially if that front needs to be 100% of the time not to fail (I'm looking at you, slippery slope of nutrition! I let my guard down once last night and fucked my otherwise fabulous week).

I've been utilizing a lot of visualization tricks lately to keep me in the zone. It doesn't usually encompass all areas, some things are easier to imagine yourself being an unstoppable force at, but it helps anyway. I've been reading about the powers of mind over matter and think it could do me some good to be more positive.

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A note on "The Productive Zone"

I'm reading an excerpt of The Talent Code as I try to determine whether this would be a good, applicable read for me. So far it's about how talented people tap into a neurological mechanism in which certain patterns of targeted practice build skill. Without realizing it they enter a zone of accelerated learning that can be accessed by those who know how. That's the talent code. I feel like I've touched on that in the past while studying but in the book they're talking more about things that require motor skills. I'm sure it's a decent read but I don't think it's quite what I'm looking for, as I don't have a serious skill with a goal that requires a lot of practice (sure I'd like to be a better guitar player, but it's not up there on the list of priorities). What my goals require is a lot of learning.